My daughter really loves ice skating. She bugged me so much to switch her from group lessons to private lessons. Her best friend is doing competitions, and my daughter is still in group lessons, learning basics. Once l asked her if she would like one day to do a solo when she gets better, and she told me Oh no mom, never I am so shy l could never go in front of everybody alone and do this...

My question is :

How many of you ice skaters doing competitions were really really shy and did competitions anyways....

Did someone succeeded in convincing you, and if so how? What did they say to you.

Did your parents force you to do it, and you did and you realized it was not so bad after that, or it was bad, and you hate your parents for it!!!

Or were you so involved it this sport that you surmonted your fears to be able to get to the next level...

How did you overcome your fears of performing in front of people?
l want my daughter to try it at least once to see if she likes it. l do not know how to get her to this point. l do not wanna say the wrong thing. When l was young, l stopped iceskating for the same reason, l was so shy, but l always regretted it and l do not want her to just stop it, for the wrong reason.

My experience comes from competing as an adult, so my to ur questions probably would not really apply here. BUT, here r my 2 cents:

l would not force her to do it. Rather, it'd be healthier for her to be able to ease into it & decide on her own that she wants to compete. If she enjoys what she is doing & is encouraged to continue having fun with a positive attitude, maybe she will come around. When more of her peers start competing & she has reassurance from her coach, she just may want to do it - on her own.

Take her to see the local competitions - especially if there r friends who have entered. Maybe she will see it differently once she sees how it all works: the excitement of the skaters, dressing up, cheers & applauses from the audience, the air of accomplishment afterwards, etc.

Perhaps see if she'd like to enter group events in IS l . . . like group numbers (small or production) or even couples. This way she can perform in front of others with the comfort of skating with others (she wo not be alone!). When she builds her confidence with that, maybe she will see she is perfectly capable of handling a program all by herself!

Or start her off with compulsaries or a jump & spin team where no music/program is involved - just the elements. Doing a few elements is less intimidating than doing a whole program. It is all to build up confidence.

And at home, do things that encourage ''performance'' in front of people to build up that confidence. Demonstrating a skating move on the carpet with everyone around, having a dance contest amongst friends . . . or even a game of charades!

I'd say the only way to truly overcome the fears of performing in front of people is to actually do it - & to do it often. If it is something u truly want to do, u will find a way to deal with it. If it is a forced situation, u dread it terribly, & u never really learn to get over it - because u see it as a negative thing.

Emphasize all the good qualities of her skating - not the shy or fearful part. Never force - I've seen too many young skaters lose heart (and self esteem) with skating because their parents just kept pushing.

Anyway - best of luck to ur daughter & her skating!

You might want her enroll in a group activity for instance ballet that requires a recital at the end, or she'd probably want to do a duet with her friend at a skating show . Those are just ideas to get her out of the initial stage fright. Once she does one appearance, she will feel better the next one after that. HOPEFULLY

Usually rinks will have a Christmas show that skaters can participate in where u can participate as a group. Our rink holds a special class by level that practices a routine for a few weeks, then each class gets to do their routine in the show. The higher level kids do solos in between.

Being with other kids her level & getting out there could be a good way to test the waters. She might like it, but she might hate it, too.

It would not hurt to tell her straight out that u felt the same way when u were her age but that u regretted it later. l do not know how old ur daughter is but letting her know u relate will go a long way with her.

The other thing is that there r other ways to be in ice skating than singles skating. There is synchro teams if she likes being around other kids. There is also Moves in the Field, which is a series of tests to pass. You do have to be on the ice by yourself but only in front of judges & a few spectators.

And lastly, it may be that by the time she is spinning & jumping she will be used to being out there in front of people & she will be ready. Having confidence in her own skill will help.

l have been skating for less than a year & recently did my first competition with a syncro team, with whom l had been with for 3 months. Ok, its not the same as skating on ur own [ which l will be doing in a few months!] however, it is the same principles. l am a REALLY shy, underconfident person, & was so scared before the comp, however the second l got on the ice l just thought, 'you know what, have fun, thats why u skate, thats what its all about !' & l did, l just smiled & forgot about everyone else watching & had the best time of my life! Its ur daughter who will have to overcome it on her own really. To help though, here r some ideas.
Make sure that she actually likes ice skating, & is not doing it for anyone else but herself..
Make sure she has lots of lessons & plenty of ice time to practice
Encourage her & tell her thats shes doing well
Do not push her into anything
Be honest with her about her skating

Hope l have helped, & hope u sort it out! x

l was the same exact way. l am really shy & l always have been. My mom quit gymnastics because of being shy & did not want me to loose out on something l loved so she made a deal with me. If l competed at least once, then l could decide if l wanted to quit or keep competing. l did just that & it was an amazing experience. My parents in a way forced me to do it, but it was for my own good & l am glad that they did. l still compete to this day, & when l am out in competition, l am an entirely different person. l become the opposite of shy. l would encourage ur daughter to compete, it is the most amazing feeling & l can almost guarantee that she will love it!

l am 12 & l just had my 1st competition last week. Only my dad went there. l talked to my councilor before the competition & he told me to take deep breaths. There was not really a lot of people. You're not trying to impress the people. You r trying to impress the judges. No one really tried to convince me, in fact l was the one who tried to convince my parents! Anyway when l got on the ice & the music started, l just skated. It was like everything was muscle memory & all l had to do was smile! Even if u fall or u know u did really bad just smile then the judges would think, maybe that was not so bad. l won 1st place!! :D

l was ''Or were u so involved it this sport that u surmonted ur fears to be able to get to the next level.''

My first competition was in the IS l level Delta last year in June. Before l started skating, l was a rather shy girl also. absolutely disliked recitals of any kind, shows at schools, demos, speech, public speaking.

so l was shaking my butt off at the competition.

BUT. as soon as l stepped onto the ice, l felt the kind of feeling like '' l HAVE TO DO THIS. it is too late now.'' So l just went for it, & as soon as it was for, well, the butterflies had gone.

Also when l was watching the video of my routine, l had a sly smile on my face as l stroked to my starting position, so it did not seemed like l was nervous at all!





P.S. My coach & parents did not pressure me that much, for it was my first competition.

Afterwards l did the Christmas show & another competition, & now l can not get enough of competitions.

l am itching to compete soon again, but my parents would not let me compete OFTEN. it costs alot. Plus my old rink closed so l switched rinks & starting my first lesson with my new coach this Friday.